An Aha Moment!!!

i had an Aha! moment last night. i realize that for the past 9 years i have been dating. Since i was 15, i've been someone's girlfriend, close friend or i've wanted to be someone's girlfriend. If i wasn't in a relationship, i was searching for the next one or i was casually dating until the next one came along. And when i wasn't dating, i was longing for someone. Nine years of my life and i spent most of the time chasing guys! i fell to my knees last night and i asked God for forgiveness! All those years i spent chasing guys, i should have been chasing God. i should have been building a foundation with Him! i was so blinded! Trying to be the person the world said i should be! i'm tired now! The Spirit has led me to this place. i need to rest a while. i need to just take this time to strengthen my relationship with God. No dating! No boyfriend! Just me and Him! That's all i need right now! my focus is on putting God first in my life! and when He's ready,He'll send that special person to me and i'll be ready for a relationship. It's God's time!
Besides, with classes and the book and all the other things i need to be doing, when will i have time for a reationship?
As for the lover-turned- friend situation, we're friends and he understands what i'm trying to do and he's supportive. He's always been a good friend and i'm grateful for that! :-)